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After lunch, we had a free period of an hour, during which we could talk to one of the teachers which as mentioned I never did , take a nap, or walk in the woods. These two were a Zenned-out looking married couple in their 50s who looked less like the Maharishi Mahesh Yogi and more like a heavily sedated Gray Davis and Ellen DeGeneres — right down to the button-down shirts and Dockers they wore. Easier said than done!! Then the lunch gong went off at 11am, and everyone would again file silently into the mess hall for the main meal and basically, the highlight of the day. I had plenty to keep me busy!
What then of the profound enjoyment and satisfaction they spoke of experiencing when one performs acts of dana giving or charity — as when they encouraged us to consider taking our next course as a server? As previously mentioned, I was very shy and introverted growing up, but ever since I discovered booze around the age of 23 I have worked diligently, patiently and persistently to force myself out of my shell, and have genuinely turned myself into an extrovert over time. I was forced to whisper responses when the meditation teacher asked about my progress every few days, but I kept my answers to an absolute minimum: But it was 4: All that sitting around on your ass really works up an appetite, I guess! After three days of just focusing on your breath, however, on the 4th day they teach you the actual Vipassana technique, which is sort of a body-scanning thing: Saved yet again by books, wonderful books! All snarkiness aside, I did gradually re-acclimate to the real world over the next 24 hours. Anyway, back to logistics: I also developed a fondness for buttered toast with miso paste — some freaky health-food concoction made of fermented garbanzo beans that was really awesome on toast! Anyway, after the 6: But during the unstructured periods, you were permitted to shift as needed. Thank dog they had put up all these little displays on tables around the room — the history of Vipassana, the history of that particular facility, the history of Vipassana in prisons. Then the lunch gong went off at 11am, and everyone would again file silently into the mess hall for the main meal and basically, the highlight of the day. Lucky for us, none of us had to work until after the New Year…so we had plenty of time to sit around yakking in all our naked, self-important glory. Could it be the same thing?! I stayed in the meditation hall right up until lunch, and when I finally went into the mess hall it was overwhelming! But the hot spring was only about 90 minutes away, outside Ukiah…so before we left, my friend and I volunteered to pitch in and help clean the kitchen, which we did for about an hour and a half — him washing dishes and me sweeping up every stray lentil and grain of rice, until that kitchen was clean enough for the next crop of students to eat off the floor! Or maybe succeeded at meditation, haha. Instead, just observe it and let it go — anicca, anicca, anicca. Was I supposed to allow the tick to feed peacefully, possibly transmitting Lyme disease and whatnot? As a server, you still get to meditate several hours a day…but you also spend several hours in the kitchen, prepping and cleaning so that the other students get to enjoy delicious meals. A contrarian by nature, I started to wonder how strict these Buddhists really were about the five precepts — for instance, the one about not killing. Thankfully none of this happened, but it gave me an interesting philosophical quandary to ponder and fill some of my many lonely hours. But even when I walked all the way to the end of the trail and back in complete darkness, feeling my way along the path in the spooky, silent woods using just my feet and hands, I never did come to any harm. Most of the time I got distracted before I even got to my throat — and would have to refocus and start all over again. What is wrong with white womanhood these days that we are so unfulfilled?
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